Mother's Day

Mother's day is difficult for so many, myself included. My mother passed away under tragic circumstances just over 4 years ago.  The african violet was hers. I found it almost dead in her office as we were cleaning out her things and somehow managed to bring it back to life. It has flourished and bloomed ever since and is a constant reminder to me of my mother and her beauty. Her name was Rebecca Jean, though she went by Jeannie and was Mom or Mama to me.

I have been "celebrating" mother's day with my husband's family the past few years and this year I turned to my wonderful husband and said, "I'm not doing mother's day this year." He looked at me, nodded his head and said "Okay". I wish I had said this sooner. I plan on spending part of mother's day honoring my mother, allowing myself to be angry at her and allowing myself to love her.   

I plan on watching all my favorite movies, especially ones my mom and I watched together. I plan on baking the chocolate chip cookies in her honor, as she was the one who taught me how as a little girl, standing on a step-stool at the kitchen counter shrouded in an enormous apron and yet still covered in flour. I would sneak tastes of the dough and catch mom sneaking tastes too. When the cookies came out of the oven we would eat a few right away, chocolatey and warm, sitting together at the table. I miss her, it is a simple truth and one that will never change.
It is bittersweet, mother's day. I smile at the memories and cry that she is no longer here. I know dear friends that this is a painful day for as well, and I am thinking of each of them, while we all endure/observe the day in our own ways.

Mother's day should become "National, love everyone who has loved and nurtured you-and love them every day not just on one day" day. Cherish every day with loved ones, you don't know if you get another day with them, or even another moment.

I also want to say that I know so many wonderful mothers. They are dear friends and family-members who do such a thankless and beautiful job of being mothers. You are beautiful women and beautiful mothers and deserve to be recognized for that. Enjoy your flowers and cards, breakfasts in bed and chocolates, and the love from your family, soak in each moment.
Though she is not my mother, my step-mother is a beautiful woman who has welcomed me with open arms and plenty of love. So I think of her too on this mother's day and am grateful for her in my life.

My love to all,

Jessica Denhart